I can alter the actions of a king and leave puzzled the greatest of philosophers. What am I?

Santa shakes his belly like me. What am I?

I am sometimes white but usually black. I take you there, but I never bring you back. What am I?

I can't go left, I can't go right. I am forever stuck in a building over three stories high. What am I?

I widen my jaws when you poke two fingers in me. I especially like to devour papers. What am I?

I am a lunch money thief. What am I?

I go up and never come down no matter how hard you wish. As I get higher, more wrinkles crawl on to the face. What am I?

I pass before the sun, yet make no shadow. What am I?

I am essential to life on earth! I am split into thirds. Two thirds are the same. One of the thirds is 8. The other two are 1 each. What am I?

I am as simple as a circle, worthless as a leader; but when I follow a group, their strength increases tenfold. By myself I'm practically nothing. What am I?

I give people a huge fright, but at the end I'm sweet. I normally celebrate at night, when there's less heat. What am I?

Find me on body builders or in the drink aisle. What am I?

I come in different colors and shapes. Some parts of me are curvy, some are straight. You can put me anywhere you like, but there is only one right place for me. What am I?

I am a kind of coat that can only be put on when wet. What am I?

I come off a beautiful creature, which soars in the sky. I come off a peckish creature, which has a tail as mighty as the sun! I am sometimes dirty, and parents beg you not to pick me up. What am I?

Though liquid in nature, don't push me too far, for then I will break, and the damage may scar. What am I?

I count time, but have no end. Tick tick, but I am not a clock. What am I?

I am black when you buy me, red when you use me. When I turn white, you know it's time to throw me away. What am I?

I am mother and father, but never birth or nurse. I'm rarely still, but I never wander. What am I?

I have a head but no body, a heart but no blood. Just leaves and no branches, I grow without wood. What am I?